overblood:

long-distance friendships are terrible because you can’t meet up with them whenever you want and hang out on any given day which is why when i’m president i’m relocating the entire human population into a 10,000,000 story skyscraper that also acts as a bridge from earth to the moon which comes with the added benefit of swinging the moon around like a fucking mace, god damn it’s gonna look so cool. what was i talking about

(Source: flapwagon)



egberts:

you kids today with your texting and murder

airoehead:

I like being sent legit anon asks it’s like being interviewed by a fan


spaghettipeej:

spaghettipeej:

i think i accidentally ate some of my grandma’s ashes that were on her bed

MY GRANDMA SMOKES I MEANT CIGARETTE ASHES

childservices:

horoscope app: today u gonna #stunt on these hoes
me: damn….das tru

wisped:

wisped:

What do you call someone who is obsessed with the moon

a lunatic